time-out to blog.

I'm in the middle of many things while writing this blog. I'm a little stressed. So much to do with so little time. it's our WKC next weekend and still, a lot has to be done. Registration, PFOs. follow up the areas... thinking about it makes me dizzy.

But still, I found time to blog. I want to de-stress myself (is there such a word?). I stopped for awhile to relax and do something different. So I could do more. So I could be more of use.
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This morning, I had the chance to spend time with my mom for breakfast. She has been complaining for some days now that I don't have time for her anymore since I'm busy. It was difficult to focus on what she was saying since my mind is busy thinking about WKC. And then I realized that i'm not really into the whole situation. My body is there present, but my mind is wandering off somewhere. I almost anger her because of this. it's a good thing that I realized it sooner before that happened.
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sometimes, we busy ourselves doing so many things but realizing in the end that it's not important after all.
we place so many things-to-do in our schedule so we can say that we're busy.
or spending so much in the internet realizing that after so many hours, you haven't accomplished anything.
talking to someone on the phone for a long time and when you finish your conversation, you'll realized that you wasted talking nonsense after all.

We based our self-worth because of the things that we do. We let what we do defines us as a person. But we forget that this is not the reason of having a life worth living. if you want to live a happy and meaningful life, value what's REALLY important: family, relationships and God.
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Going back to WKC mode.

almost a month ago, we (the KFL girls) were surprised to know that everything that we have worked for how many month for the WKC will be changed. My first reaction was a loud "HUWAAAATTT???" after Joanne told me about it. We're really excited of the first plan that we have actually build everything around it. But God has something else on His mind after all.

The changes made were far different from what we had planned. As in back to zero. It's like "how are we gonna do these in less than a month???". Yes, it seems impossible to plan for a conference with a little time. There are so many things to consider. There are many things needed to prepare. But I think, amidst all these preparations we're doing, is the preparation of ourselves.
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The other day, I found out that someone close to me is living a double life. I was heart-broken to know about it (even until now). I just realized that even if you spend a lot of time together, even if you talk a lot, share a lot, it doesn't guarantee that you really know each other.

I just remembered what my guy best friend told me before (when we had a fight): "Hindi porket nagkwekwento sa iyo, ay may karapatan ka ng make-elam sa buhay niya (Not because that person always shares with you, that you have a reason to meddle with his/her life)" .
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"Am I living a double life as well?" was the thought that's going through my head now. It's a difficult thing to lead two different lives. I know the feeling, I have been there. i though I could hide it until I die. I thought I could live in darkness and light. I thought I could pull it off. But when you already know God, you cannot hide anything. And He will bring anything in darkness to light. And when He does, you will be humiliated, you will suffer the consequences. But the great news is, you will not be in bondage anymore. You will live a free life, just because God has set you free from the chains of sin.

I'm glad i'm not living a double life anymore as I prepare for the WKC. God can't use us fully if we still have impurities in our lives. We'll have a hard time listening to His voice, or to be sensitive to the leading of the Spirit. It'll be difficult for us to enjoy God's blessings because we are always on the look-out, if anyone's watching every move we make.

Living in darkness may give you delight at first, but believe me, it's not a place where you want to stay all your life. It's not worth it at all. But living a life in light, a pure and righteous life may be difficult but I will bet everything that I have, that it's the best life that you can have. Because it's the life that God has for us. So grab it, live it, because God has given it already to us when He gave His son and died for the cross.
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I'm going back to work in a while. I'm glad I had this chance to blog. And as we continue to prepare for the WKC, I am very excited, looking forward for the next days to come. Coz I know that in the middle of these sudden changes and busy schedules, He will see us through. It's all in the matter of looking at things. And it's all about our personal relationship with God.

When we work for the Lord, let's remember that it's not all about us doing the work, but it's all about God working through us!

Be blessed! Live. Love. Light.